40's

the issue our parents face is they fell in love in a period where you dated who you encountered, either directly, or through friends of friends, at clubs and social events. they now face growing old with the same partner in a  world where you are one swipe, or one click away from seeing new faces, and new opportunities that they make feel they missed out when they were young. so in a period where they deny 'getting old', these youthful antics may seem attractive. 

this transition is one of lifes biggest in the human existence. its the next transition after the transition from childhood to adulthood through ages 14-20. but going through an experience humans have not experienced before, the ability to unlimitedly mate and expand socially, makes it clear as to why parents can find it difficult to stay loyal. we wonder why people who have loved each other for so long can fall apart, but people struggle with transitions, people deny the truth.

im struggling going into adulthood. i still feel 15. but im 17. im at college, but i still get talked at from teachers like im at a summer camp, and the classroom looks no different in context and decoration from when i was 11; so how am i supposed to feel grown?

my mind feels 30, my body 20, my core 17, but im made to feel 13. i feel like ill always be a kid. that scares me. i feel ill never be mature and get a proper job and be a professional. i enjoy my freedom to much. i enjoy my youth too much. im at an age where i dont need to grow up entirely, but i do need to be more grown, sort of a no mans land between childhood and a 9 to 5. im just falling through everything.

im glad my parents taught me independence. making my own money. saving my money. styling me maturely and teaching me to be myself.

intURnet frENDz is coming together.